The Way the Heart Works
by ghibli22
Summary: When Lovino discovers he has feelings for Antonio, how will the Italian react? SpainRomano
1. Realization

_**Authors Notes: Um… hi? Second post on to and I want to say this is NOT THE WAY I WRITE. I wrote this story a long while ago and my writing style has developed a lot since then and I'm working on a sequel right now which I'm really, really proud of and I just don't feel like/don't have the time to rewrite this. Heh, heh… uh… right…. Sorry. I'll shut up now… Please don't think too hard about me orz.**_

Lovino let out a large yawn as he closed the door and threw his keys on the table. It had been a long weekend. Not only was there a huge meeting on Friday, but Antonio had made him stay at his place for the rest of the trip. Not that this was unusual. It happened every time.

Walking into his room he tossed his overnight bag onto the bed. He let out another yawn. What time was it anyway?

Rummaging through his bag, Lovino pulled out his dirty clothes and put them in the hallway to be washed in the morning. Opening his dresser, he pulled out a fresh set and stuffed them into the bag. Knowing Antonio, it was always good to be prepared for an unexpected visit.

Despite how drowsy he was, Lovino headed into the bathroom to take a shower. He always liked to be clean before he fell asleep. Years of living with Antonio had burned the principle into him and old habits were hard to change.

He stripped down and stepped into the shower, jumping a little as the cold water hit his bare skin but relaxing once it heated up. Picking up his shampoo, Lovino started to rub it into his hair, unconsciously avoiding that one strand. But something was off. He couldn't quite place it until… aha! He had accidentally use Antonio's shampoo. That bastard, he always forgot to take it with him.

Lovino took a deep breath of the familiar scent. Somehow it made him feel relaxed, safe. He wondered why. After all, it wasn't that important.

"Dammit," he said as he turned off the water and stepped out of the shower, "Why do I keep thinking of that guy?" he dried off and slipped on a night shirt, frowning, "I just got _away_ from him. Doesn't that mean I should stop thinking about him?"

Slipping beneath the covers of his bed, Lovino turned and reached for his alarm clock. Antonio had given it to him years ago. It was shaped like a tomato and ugly as hell, but for some reason he had never thrown it out. His frown deepened as he set it back on the table pulled the sheets over his head.

Running his fingers through his hair he breathed in the scent of Antonio's shampoo. Or he guessed it was technically just the way Antonio smelled…

Lost in his thoughts, Lovino got careless. His fingers brushed past his curl and he shot straight up, gasping. He could feel his cheeks redden and an instant layer of sweat form on his back. His heart beat against his ribcage.

Waiting to calm down, he thought about how many times Antonio had done exactly the same thing, both by accident and on purpose. Including this weekend. Lets see… they had come home, both beat from the meeting. They had gone into Antonio's room where his stuff was already sitting on a chair. He had wanted to go to the bathroom but Antonio had grabbed his hand and pulled him onto the bed. He tried to get up when Antonio had reached out, a smile plastered on his idiotic face, and gently tugged-

Lovino's eyes widened. His heart was beating even more rapidly now, like a million tiny birds trying to break free. His breathing was quick and the blush that filled his cheeks wouldn't go away. He was sure Antonio would be teasing him right about now… No! Wait!

He put one hand on his chest, and one on his head, "Oh shit…"

_**So uh… other chapters will be longer then this and I promise: THEY WILL GET BETTER.**_

_**ghibli22**_


	2. Speed Limits Mean Nothing to Italians

That night, Lovino tossed and turned. Spending more time awake then asleep, he passed his hours staring at his alarm clock and watching the moon move across the sky. More then once he stuffed his head under his pillow, trying to block out the thoughts and memories that ran through his mind like a film. A horrible film that played without stopping. But, he admitted to himself around four in the morning, maybe it wasn't that horrible. After all, he had lived with the man for a good portion of his life. It wasn't something you exactly forgot.

When the alarm clock went off he still hadn't gotten any sleep. Lovino reached over his wrinkled sheets and hit the snooze bar, another habit he had picked up from living with Antonio. Just realizing that fact made him scowl in annoyance.

With a groan he turned off the alarm clock and threw his legs over the side of the bed. Grabbing a pair of pants, he slipped them on and walked into the kitchen to get some coffee. As the pot gurgled to life, Lovino opened the fridge and looked inside. Not finding anything he wanted to eat or cook, he closed it again and leaned against the door. Wasn't the coffee done yet?

He started to pace back and forth across the kitchen, looking at the pot every ten seconds.

"Oh, screw this!" he yelled. Grabbing a jacket and his keys, Lovino ran outside, slamming the door as he went.

* * *

The trip to his brother's house was short. Not only was there hardly any traffic, but he was speeding. Really speeding. An hour and a half later he pulled into Feliciano's drive, disconcerted by the lack of his brother's car. He prayed it was in the garage.

Lovino felt like running up the walkway but forced himself to stay calm. Hands in his pockets it felt like years before he reached the door and rang the bell. One minute later no one had answered. Taking a hand out of his pocket he banged it on the door, knowing very well there would be no answer.

"Damn," going back to the car he grabbed a pen and a piece of paper. Coming back to the front door he used it to lean on to write his note.

When you get back from that potato-bastard's place (because I know you're there, Dammit!) come over.

Lovino

Sliding the note under the door, he raced black to the car and jumped in. For a while he just sat there, breathing heavily. What had changed about him? He used to know what was going to happen. His days were, well maybe not stable but at least had some layer of predictability. He used to have some control over his life. He used to know exactly how he felt about… certain people. But now everything was up in the air.

"Shit. You better get back fast Feliciano," Putting the car into gear, he raced out of the drive way, hating that he had gone to his little brother for help. But it was two late now. The note was under the door and there was no way he could get it back. And he had no one else to turn to for this kind of…thing, this… situation. Was it a situation?

Pulling onto the highway, he speed off toward his own home, wondering if the coffee was still good.


	3. An Irrational Fear of Answering Machines

By the time Lovino got back the coffee was cold. Dumping it and making another batch, he walked to the answering machine to see if Feliciano had called. Before pressing the play button, he stopped. Was he really so desperate? Was he really pathetic enough to be waiting to hear from his _little _brother to ask for advice on lo-… on whatever it was…

Okay, maybe he was. Damn.

He punched the play button. A peppy female voice said, "_You have two new massages. You have no saved massages. First voice message,_" Lovino jumped as Antonio's voice emanated from the machine. He cut the message off quickly. He wasn't sure he wanted to listen to it. Just hearing Antonio say, "Hello," had set his heart beating ten times faster. He felt like the word kept echoing off the walls, embedding its self in the rugs and woodwork. What the hell was wrong with him? This had never happened to him before.

Oh, for the love of! He spent his life dealing with the mafia. He hade seen the seen the tip of a gun pointed at his head at least twenty times. Maybe more. Yet here he stood, completely freaked over a small piece of machinery.

With an enormous amount of willpower Lovino rewound the machine. With an even greater amount of willpower he managed to press play.

"_Hey, Lovino! Where are you? Listen. I was thinking that the new tomato crop just came in and you could come over. I could make some sauce and you could make some sort of pasta you like, or something. Or, you could teach me to make a pizza! I've always wanted to learn! Well, we'll decide once you get here. I'll call you later! Oh, and if you don't respond by tomorrow night, I'm coming over to pick you up!_" "_End of first message…_"

Lovino stopped the machine, but he didn't erase the message. Antonio wanted to see him. Alright, this wasn't exactly unusual, but… it felt different. Then it hit him.

"Oh shit," Antonio wanted him to come over. Lovino didn't have a choice. When Antonio put his mind to something he wouldn't quit. That means by tomorrow night, whether he liked it or not, he would by with Antonio.

His mind felt like it was on fast-forward. He was going to be with Antonio. How did he feel about that? Did he have feelings about that? Why did he have feelings about that? What?

Lovino looked back at the machine. Did he dare listen to the other message? It could be his brother but it could also be Antonio again. He did say he would call back.

"What the hell…" he pressed play on the machine and heard his brothers voice ring out. He let out a sigh of relief and his heart rate slowed to a relatively normal pace.

"_Lovino, Lovino? Hello, are you there? I got your note, are you okay? Hello? I'll be right over, alright? By the way, how did you know I was at Ludwig's place? Hello? Okay. Bye!"_

Lovino walked into the kitchen and spotted the coffee he had once again forgotten to drink. But it didn't matter any more. He was to edgy for coffee. Instead he poured himself a glass of water and sat at the counter to await Feliciano.

No sooner had he finished his glass then the doorbell started ringing incessantly. He leapt up and ran to the door. Opening it, he found Feliciano with a worried look on his face.

"There you are! I've been so worr-!"

Lovino pulled his brother inside, "What took you so long, dammit!"


	4. Realization, part 2

Lovino pulled his brother into the house and slammed the door behind him.

"Lovino? What's wrong with you?"

"W-What? Oh, nothing,"

Feliciano crossed his arms and stared at him. "I don't believe you. You come to my house in a rush, leave a note under my door, and rush back out! Exactly how fast were you going?"

"I wasn't driving _that_ fast,"

"Oh yes you were! There are skid marks on my driveway! Now tell me what's wrong."

Lovino sighed and ran a hand through his hair. This was what he wanted, so why was it so damn difficult!

Looking at his brother, he tried to decide how to start. He couldn't exactly say, "Hey, I think I'm in lo-… I-I think I have feelings for-……" Crap.

He noticed Feliciano wasn't wearing his shirt. He was wearing _a_ shirt, just not _his_ shirt. It must have been that potato-bastard's shirt. Hey, wait a minute…

"I see you were at Ludwig's place,"

"Huh? What?" Feliciano looked down, "Oh, right. I didn't have a clean change of clothes so he-" Lovino watched as recognition crossed over his face. Slowly Feliciano raised his head and stared at him, "Did you just call him Ludwig?"

Lovino chose not to answer.

With strength you wouldn't expect in such a small figure Feliciano jumped on top of him and pinned him to the floor.

"W-What the hell?! Get off of me right now!" But he refused to budge.

"No! Something's going on with you! You called Ludwig by his name and you never call him that! I refuse to move until you tell me what's going on!"

Lovino sighed into the floorboards. He felt utterly defeated, both physically and emotionally. It was not a feeling he enjoyed. He mumbled something into the woodwork.

"What?" his brother asked.

He took a few deep breathes and mumbled something again.

"What?"

"Well, maybe if you got off of me you could hear me, idiot!"

Reluctantly Feliciano got off of him and sat cross-legged on the floor. Lovino straightened up and coughed a few times from inhaling some dust. His brother just stared at him, "I'm waiting,"

"Its not really such a big deal," he said, trying to downplay what had already grown into… something, "I mean, I don't know. It's just that something's been happening to me and I don't know what."

Feliciano looked confused, "Okaay, and why didn't you ask Antonio about it?"

"Because I didn't want to, dammit!" Lovino felt his face grow hot. He hoped his brother would take it for anger, "And besides, I… I think he may be part of the problem."

A silence stretched across the room. Lovino pulled his legs up and contemplated his own breathing.

"Oooohhh,"

"Oh, what, idio-!" Suddenly Feliciano was on top of him again, his arms thrown around Lovino's neck.

"Hey! Let go of me! I said let go!" but no matter how he struggled Feliciano would not release his hold on him.

"I'm so happy for you, Lovino!" he squealed, "It's great, so very, very great!"

"What's so great, you bastard? The fact that you're squeezing me to death? Now let go, dammit!"

"But it's so great that you're in love! That's it, right? With Antonio?"

Lovino stopped struggling. He felt his eyes widen as his brother spoke the word he had been avoiding since last night. It was something that had been toying with him, something that had been hinted at, but had never come up for air.

"Love…?" Fast as he could Lovino shot up, shaking off Feliciano. Running to the bedroom his mind was racing, "_What? Love?? No, no it couldn't be, could it? COULD IT?_"Damn, what was going on with him? There was no way he could be in _love_ with Anto-… with Anto-…

"Oh shit, shit, shit!" he yelled and slammed the door behind him. Sliding down to the floor, Lovino waited for his eyes to adjust to the dim light. He heard his brother come up to the door, stop, then head back in the direction of the kitchen. He knew Feliciano was an idiot but he was grateful for the fact that he new when to let him cool his head.

When his breathing had slowed back to a normal pace, Lovino picked himself off the floor and walked over to the bed. He didn't know what he was doing anymore. Nothing made sense. Putting his head in his hands he wondered when everything had gotten so screwed up.

He had no clue how long he sat there. Whether it was minutes or hours he couldn't tell. After a while he turned his head and looked at that idiotic alarm clock Antonio had given to him. It had stopped.

With a wave of anger Lovino snatched the clock off of the table. He held it above his head with every intention to smash it to a million little pieces against the hardwood floor. But he didn't move. His arm remained poised above his head, much like the silence before the storm.

"Dammit…" Lovino slowly placed the clock back on the table. He couldn't do it. As much as he wanted to forget that clock even existed, he couldn't do it. He got up and pulled off his pants and shirt. He needed to sleep. Desperately.

Mere moments after he had slipped under his sheet he heard a small knock at his door. Seconds later, Feliciano poked his head around the frame.

"Lovino?"

He didn't answer and pretended to be asleep. That way he wouldn't have to endure his brother's probing questions.

He heard Feliciano softly close the door, obviously trying not to wake his supposedly sleeping sibling, and tiptoe across the room. Feeling the bed dip down told Lovino that his brother had climbed in beside him.

Lovino lay there and listened to his brother's breathing. In out, in out. He wondered if he had fallen asleep yet.

"Are you asleep, Lovino?" Apparently not. None the less Lovino didn't respond. There was nothing he wanted to say.

"Hey, hey Lovino?" He felt his brother shift so he could look at him. When he still received no answer he sighed and put his head back on the pillow.

"I know your asleep and can't hear me," Feliciano said in a whisper, "but there's something I really, really want to tell you. This weekend while you were hanging out with Antonio… Ludwig proposed to me,"

He felt his body go ridged. _What…?_

"It was really, really funny, too! I don't think he had any idea what was going on. But Lovino? I think I'm going to say yes… Just wanted you to know. Well, goodnight!"

Lovino lay there in the darkness, his eyes wide. He listed to his brother's light snoring until he finally fell into a fitful sleep.

**See? I told you they'd get longer! ^_^ You don't have to review if you don't want to but every comment is welcome (unless you really, really hate it, in which case you shouldn't eve be reading).**

**BTW: this is ch 4/6+an Epilogue. **


	5. Grand Theft Auto, The Italian Way

Lovino awoke in the morning to find his brother missing. Lethargically he rolled over to check the time. After staring at it for a few seconds he remembered the clock had stopped. With a groan he put a hand over his eyes. He had hardly gotten any sleep. Again.

Succumbing to the inevitable he got up and snagged some clothes from the open closet. While he put them on he tried not to think about what he heard last night… It wasn't working.

"_What the hell is he thinking? Oh wait, he's probably not thinking, as usual! Every time he's around that guy his IQ drops so far it hit's the Pacific!" _Lovino started to button his shirt, "_The next time I see that potato-loving bastard he's gonna wish he never met Feliciano!_"

In his rage a button flew off his shirt and ricocheted off the wall back to his feet. Its smooth white surface shone in the dim light. His anger diffused for a moment, he reached down to pick it up.

A high pitched squeal broke though the silence of the house. Startled, Lovino jumped and banged his head on a low shelf. Cursing under his breath, he stood and ran out of the room, rubbing his throbbing head. The only other person in the house was Feliciano, and Lovino was very well aware of how accident-prone his little brother could be.

Lovino slid into the kitchen, expecting the worst, only to find Feliciano standing over a pot on the stove, his hair still mussed from sleep. One hand held a large wooden spoon while he was sucking the index finger of the other. Evidentially he had burnt himself. Which was odd because Feliciano was an incredible cook. Better then, Lovino hated to admit, he could ever hope to be.

"What in the world are you doing?" he asked as he plopped down into the nearest stool. Feliciano turned and smiled, still sucking on his finger. There were dark circles under his eyes.

"Mm m mmm mm mm mmmm,"

Lovino pointed at the sink, "Try taking the finger _out_ of your mouth, genius."

With an incredibly cheery popping sound Feliciano removed his finger and started to run it under cold water.

"Thanks! What I tried to say was that I was making breakfast!"

He rolled his eyes. Why did his brother have to be so darn dense?

"No I mean what happened to your finger? You always get so absorbed in your cooking… Actually it's kind of weird. Why are the only thing you focus on art and food?"

"Because art is fun and food tastes good. Unless England makes it." Both brothers gave an involuntary shiver, "And I burnt my finger because I've never made it before and I'm really, really tired."

"Hm? What are you making?

"Oatmeal~!"

Lovino almost fell of his seat, "O-oatmeal?? What the hell for?"

His brother looked disappointed, "Ludwig told me that its good for you and you hardly got any sleep so I just thought…" he trailed off as Lovino shot him a look. Of course Feliciano had no clue that he had heard his 'confession' last night. Knowing him he probably thought he was still upset, if you could call it that, about the oatmeal.

He sighed and put his head in his hands. He considered apologizing but Feliciano had already started stirring again. It was physically impossible for that guy to hold a grudge. Hey wait a second…

"Hey, Feliciano?"

"What?"

"How did you know I didn't get much sleep last night?"

The younger man turned and smiled in a way that was supposed to look mysterious. It didn't work. "Well, we're brothers, aren't we?" He nodded his head slowly. Where was this going? "So that means we have a _special_ connection of course! And I know when you aren't feeling well!"

With a flourish he turned back to the stove. Lovino just stared at the back of his head. He couldn't be serious. _'Special connection'_? What the hell did that mean?

"Oh, and you kept kicking me last night. Do you always move around that much? I don't remember you doing that when we were little…"

Lovino felt like banging his head into something very, very hard. Why was his brother always like this? He turned every simple answer into a riddle! With a groan he settled for resting his head on the counter. A few moments later he heard the sound of a bowl being placed next to him and the scrape of a chair as Feliciano sat down. He turned his head to look at the bowl. He hated oatmeal. Not that he had ever tasted it but he was sure it would be utterly disgusting. Grudgingly he picked up his spoon and started eating. Okay, so maybe it wasn't _that_ bad.

At first they sat together in silence, the only sound the occasional clinking of the silverware on the bowls. But Feliciano could never stand not to talk for long.

"So are you going over to Antonio's house any time soon?"

He paused with the spoon halfway up to his mouth. He really didn't want to talk about this but he also knew Feliciano would never get off his back otherwise.

"Well, I dunno… He _did_ invite me over to-"

"You should go! Really!"

"Why should I? Just being around him for two seconds makes me think I'm going to lose my mind."

"Exactly!"

"… Exactly what?"

"Um… Because!"

Now Lovino was getting annoyed, "Because what, dammit!?"

But he didn't answer. He just crossed his arms with a smile on his face as if he had just solved every promise in the world.

Lovino sighed and put his spoon down. This wasn't going anywhere fast.

"Listen, idiot, I'll think about it, okay? But just _think_ about it. No way in hell is that the same as me yes. I'm gonna take a shower so don't bother me."

* * *

Half an hour later Lovino came out of the bathroom, steam billowing out behind him. Drying himself off, he noticed something on the corner of his bed. Pulling on a shirt and picking it up, he turned it over to reveal a hurriedly scribbled note from his brother.

Dear Lovino,

While you were in the shower I called Antonio for you! Isn't that great? I told him that you would be over this evening for dinner. He said he's making pizza, you know. I went out to do some errands and then I'm going to Ludwig's place so you can just stay the night there!

Feliciano

Lovino crumpled the note in his hands. Could his brother get anymore idiotic? Now he had no choice but to go see Antonio! Well, he probably didn't have a choice to begin with but that was beside the point… Damn.

Snatching up his overnight bag from the closet he began his slow trek to the garage, trying to prolong it as much as possible. But when he got there what he saw made him stop short, and the bag fell from his hands.

"Feliciano…" he growled, "GIVE ME BACK MY CAR!!!"


	6. Stuck in the Rain

Lovino just stared at the empty space that used to be his car. He couldn't decide if Feliciano had done it intentionally or was just a bigger idiot then previously thought and had grabbed the wrong car. Honestly he was leaning toward the latter. Either way it still left him with no means of transportation. That is unless…

He picked up his bag again and walked over to the wall. Feliciano didn't exactly walk here after all. He flipped the switch for the garage door to open and waited while it opened painfully slowly. Ducking down under the edge Lovino straightened up to look at his brother's car: A bright red convertible, the keys still in the ignition.

"Shit…" Feliciano was definitely playing games with his mind. But he had no choice. It was already seven...thirty? Maybe eight. It took about eleven... eleven and a half hours to get to Antonio's place. And with the time change that was...

"Oh, forget it!" Before he could think twice and change his mind he leapt into the car, turned the key and, with a positive _vroom_, tore out of the driveway. It promised to be a very, very long trip.

Maybe he could make it in ten.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Six hours into the trip the radio stopped working. Keeping one eye on the road he glared reproachfully at the small black box. Suddenly he wondered if anyone had ever kicked a radio while driving before. And lived.

An exasperated sigh escaped from his lips. Feliciano needed to get a new car. It didn't even have a CD player. Only a tape deck which left the case of disks in his bag totally useless. Either way he was completely without music, which meant no distraction from thinking about his destination.

Lovino's grip tightened on the wheel turning his knuckles a ghostly white color. It was to late to turn around now. He was already more then halfway there and there was absolutely no way in hell he was going to spend more time in France then he needed to. He scowled as he pushed down farther on the accelerator, the countryside whipping past him in a blur of color.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

"You have got to be kidding me!!" Lovino yelled and kicked the shiny red surface of the car. But the car, despite the fact that it was sporting numerous dents, sat there silently. Giving the car another kick for good measure, he whipped out his cellphone and dialed his brother's number. Boy, was he gonna give Feliciano a piece of his mind!

'_Hi! You've reached the phone of Feliciano! Which is me! Leave a message after that little beeping thing!'_

"Dammit, Feliciano! Your car is a piece of shit!"

Lovino flipped the phone closed and kicked the car again. It didn't help things much but it did make him feel better. And Feliciano couldn't get mad about it because it was his fault in the first place!

Just then something fell on his head. He reached up and touched the spot revealing the substance to be water. Wait........._water_!?

Lovino looked up to the sky as another large droplet pelted his skin.

"Oh shit..."

Mere seconds after the first drops fell the sky opened up to reveal a downpour. Faster then you could say 'rainstorm' his clothes were soaked through. Lovino ran to the back of the car and prayed that Feliciano was smart enough to have an extra umbrella. Popping the trunk open he looked down to find...... bungee chords and a colander…

_"WHY THE HELL DOES HE HAVE A COLANDER IN HIS TRUNK??"_

Slamming the lid of the trunk Lovino dug out his cellphone again and started to dial Antonio's number. He really didn't want to but it was his only option.

_"Hey, Lovi! Are you almost here?"_

"Listen Antonio! And you better listen closely because I'm only gonna say it once!" He could fell his face growing hot under the moisture, "My car broke down, I'm stuck in France, it's raining, and it's all your fault! Now you better come pick me up, dammit!"

_"Really? I'll be there as fast as I can! But I don't see how any of it is my fault, Lovi. Just calm down and I'll be there soon, okay? Bye!"_

The phone clicked and he let it fall back to his pocket. He stood there silently and willed his pulse back to normal.

"You didn't have to sound to cheery about it, idiot...."

Suddenly his head shot up and his heart started to race. This time, although he would never admit it, in fear. Slowly he backed up to the car, slipping a bit on his way. He was in _France_?! That meant he was in the homeland of history's most infamous sexual predator. Shit. This was not good.

"Dammit, Antonio," he said. He rummaged through his overnight bag, pulled out a shirt and wrapped it over his head. "You better get here quick, bastard."

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

For the two hours he waited for Antonio the rain never let up. He had gone through all his clothes trying to shield himself from it until finally he just gave up. Now he sat on the car, letting the water run through his hair and down his body. He wrapped his arms around himself in a futile attempt to keep warm. At this point he didn't care if Francis kidnapped him. At least then he would be out of the rain.

By the time Antonio's car pulled up beside his Lovino had stopped looking up at every approaching pair of headlights.

"Okay, okay," Lovino said to himself as he grabbed his sopping wet clothes and headed toward the passenger seat, "It's just Antonio, dammit! No reason to feel any differently then you did three days ago."

Sliding into the seat he slammed the door and sat with his arms crossed, refusing to look at Antonio. The Spaniard didn't seem to notice.

"Sorry to keep you waiting, Lovi. Traffic was absolute murder!"

He shrugged and continued to stare straight ahead. _Don't look at him, just don't look at him!_

"Lovino?"

"Y-yeah?"

"Is something wrong? Are you cold?"

"No! I mean yes, I'm cold. Turn up the heat will you? And let's get moving. I'm hungry!"

Antonio chuckled and put the car in gear. "What ever you say, Lovi. Off we go."

They pulled onto the rain soaked highway and sped off toward the Spanish boarder. A few times Antonio attempted to begin a conversation only to receive inconclusive statements and half-finished answers. Lovino sighed inwardly and his fingers drummed nervously against his arm. He wasn't ready for this yet. Damn. It was all Feliciano's fault.

Along the way he couldn't help glancing at Antonio through the corner of his eye. As much as he resisted he couldn't stop looking.

He leaned forward while he drove. Lovino had never noticed that before. His grip on the wheel was relaxed and loose, much like the rest of his day-to-day behavior. It made his back curve in such a way that- No! No, he wasn't going to think that. There must be other things to think about. Um… the humidity making Antonio's hair stick to his face ever so slightly. Or the tune he was humming under his breath due to the lack of conversation. O-or when his lips twitched upward when he reached a part he liked, ever so slightly and-

Lovino dug his fingernails into his arm. What the hell was he doing? He pulled his feet up on the seat, not caring if he got mud on the upholstery. He just wouldn't look anywhere except his knees for the rest of the trip. His head had started to hurt anyway, and his pants were still wet and cool from the rain.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

It was still raining by the time they reached Antonio's place. He had left almost all the lights on and they streamed onto the drive, casting awkward shadows and illuminating the individual drops of liquid. Lovino rushed to the door and let himself in before Antonio could see how red his face was. The entire ride he could feel the blush creep up his neck to his face. It was so hot it was almost painful, and his headache hadn't gone away. It throbbed every time his heart expelled blood from its valves, which, thanks to Antonio, was much more often then usual. He just needed some water. Yeah, water.

Lovino tossed his soaked clothes onto the floor and headed toward the kitchen. He ran a hand through his hair trying to return it to a more respectable state, only to feel it flop back into a matted mess. He sighed and turned the corner to the kitchen only to stop and gape at the intricate spread before him.

Every available counter space was taken up with ingredients used in pizza making: from flour for the dough to fresh tomatoes from Antonio's garden for the sauce. Everything had been accounted for and considered. There were even a few pineapple slices that he prayed were a cruel joke. Even as he heard the front door slam and lock and Antonio start to make his way to the kitchen, for some reason his legs refused to move.

"So, Lovino. What do you think?"

Lovino turned to face Antonio who was leaning against the doorframe, a smile plastered on his tan face.

"You… you did all of this…? F-for me?"

"Of course I did! I told you we were making pizza, didn't I?"

"W-well, yeah, but…" he trailed off. He put a hand to his head. His vision had started to blur. And if anything his headache had gotten worse. He felt hot all over. Oh god, it hurt. Reaching out, he tried to steady himself, knocking over a bottle of olive oil in the process.

"Lovino…! L…ino…!"

That was Antonio but Lovino hardly registered it. He only felt Antonio's arms around him as he collapsed onto the floor.


	7. The Bad, The Good, The Oblivious

Turning over in his sleep, taking in the scent of spices on the pillow. Abstract dreams, floating in and out of the conscious world. He was so hot, then cold, then hot again. He couldn't stop shaking. He didn't want to wake up… he didn't…

Something touched his face, wiping away beads of sweat. Lovino relaxed as something cool was placed on his forehead. But… wait! He was supposed to be at Antonio's place… right? Oh well, he just wanted… to fall back… to sleep…

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Lovino awoke to the sound of muffled voices drifting in through the door. He felt like shit. Turning over to check the time he was met not with that ugly tomato clock, which he now remembered was still broken, but a framed picture of himself, looking absolutely pissed at the cameraman. He stared at it for about a minute until he shot up into a sitting position, making his head spin in the process.

"Shit!" he said, grabbing his head trying to steady his thoughts, "I'm at Antonio's place!"

Ignoring the numerous complaints from his body, Lovino tossed off the covers and leapt to his feet. He had to get out of there before Antonio got back. He wasn't ready to admit his feelings to himself, much less that bastard.

Quickly he moved out into the hall, pressing himself against the wall. In the back of his mind he realized how ridiculous he must look, but decided he didn't really care. His heart beat against his chest like a convict bangs on the door of his cell, begging for freedom. Lovino carefully put one foot in front of the other, his bare feet making hardly a sound on the polished wood floors.

As he moved down the corridor the voices he'd heard earlier got louder and louder. He came to the end off the hall, the part close to the front door, and stopped. The voices were clear now, and escalated into what seemed to be an argument.

"Can't you tell me anything else?" That was Antonio. Lovino felt a small flush begin to creep up his neck at the very sound of the Spaniard's voice.

"… No," His brow furrowed in confusion. The other voice sounded familiar but he couldn't quite place it…

"Come on, Feliciano! Please?"

Lovino's eyes widened. Feliciano couldn't be here, could he? Without thinking he rounded the corner and gaped at the scene before him.

Antonio and Feliciano were standing in the entryway, the door swinging slightly on its hinges in the morning air. Antonio was gripping Feliciano's shoulders, his clear green eyes pleading. Feliciano was looking the other way, refusing to meet Antonio's gaze. As Lovino came into view, they both looked up, startled by his appearance.

"Lovi?" Antonio stated, the surprise written on his face like a billboard, "Shouldn't you still be sleeping?"

Lovino looked from one man to the other. Antonio still hadn't let go of his brother's shoulders, and for a while the three of them just stood there in silence. Finally he shook his head, laughed, and looked back up at the pair.

"…Screw you, Antonio." And with that he was off, charging through the door and out into the yard, ignoring the pebbles and sticks that dug into his feet. His speed alone was enough to stop any tears that might've fallen otherwise. Lovino ran across Antonio's property without stopping. By running, he felt he still had control over his own life.

~*~*~*~*~*~

Had Lovino stayed, he would have seen Feliciano wiggle free of Antonio's grasp and punch him. He would have seen Antonio fall back, not because of the force of the punch (which wasn't very much) but from the shock that Feliciano had done it at all. He would have seen Feliciano point out the door in the direction he had gone, and tell Antonio to go out after him. He would have seen Antonio's blank stare as he processed the information, then hop to his feet and run out the door. Then he would have seen Feliciano smile, and skip out to where Ludwig was waiting in the car. But he didn't stay. So he didn't see it.

*~*~*~*~*~

After running for a minute or so, Lovino collapsed in Antonio's garden. He leaned against a stake holding up one of the many tomato plants and gasped, trying to catch his breath.

_Damn that bastard!_ he thought to himself, digging his fingernails into the soft peat below him, the red in his face slowly subsiding. Reaching out he plucked a newly ripe tomato from a nearby vine and sunk his teeth into the soft skin, imagining it was Antonio's head.

"Lovino! Where are you?"

His grip on the tomato tightened, causing some of its bright red juice to leak out, and run down the side of his arm. Ducking closer to the plant, Lovino tried to make himself as invisible as possible. From his view through the vines, he watched as Antonio came up through the garden, still calling his name. Like hell he was going to answer. He would just sit there until-… oh shit.

Lovino slapped a hand over his mouth. He felt like he was going to sneeze.

_No you don't! _he yelled to himself, still watching Antonio's movements, _This is not going to happen! It already happens too much in all those crappy movies! No way!_

Slowly the feeling began to subside. Carefully he brought his hand away from his face and back down to the ground. Thankfully, Antonio was almost out of the garden. Just a little bit more…

Lovino coughed, followed by a muffled swear or two as Antonio spotted him. The Spaniard smiled and began walking over to his hiding place. Lovino shot up, the tomato still in his grasp, and stared. He realized that this was his chance. Right here, right now, he could tell Antonio everything that had been exploding inside of him.

"I, um… I…" he began to stutter as Antonio came closer. He couldn't push the words out, "It's just that, uh… I…"

By this time Antonio was about ten feet away, a concerned look across his face, "Lovi? Is something wrong?"

"Well-"

"If you tell me, it'll make you feel better! I promise!"

"WILL YOU JUST SHUT THE HELL UP?!" Lovino threw the tomato right at Antonio's stunned expression. He ducked and it hit a far-off tree, covering the bark and grass below with bright red pulp. Damn bull-fighting reflexes.

"God dammit Antonio, you never listen! Not once have I ever been able to say _anything_ to you without you cutting in half-way through so just shut up!" He could feel the redness once again crawl up to his face, partially in anger, partially from last night's sickness, but mostly from the feeling he got looking into Antonio's eyes, green as new spring grass.

"But, Lovi-"

"No! There you go again, dammit! Not letting me finish!" Lovino was on a role now, pacing back and forth across the garden and gesturing wildly, "Just shut up! My god, I mean, do you ever even think about half the stuff that comes out of your mouth? Or what you do for that matter? Think about all those summits you would have missed if I hadn't woken you up! And how many times have you pulled this," he gestured to his curl, "at those very meetings?! You are just so damn annoying and dense that I can't stand it sometimes!"

He turned to face a very shocked Antonio, "And what's up with you and my brother, huh? You are _always _running to him, then coming back and telling me about it. As if I don't hear enough about him. All my life I've heard, 'Feliciano did this' and 'Feliciano did that' and 'Why can't you be more like your brother, Lovino?' from everybody! I don't need that kind of shit from you! Am I not good enough, or something? Not perfect enough to meet your obviously god-like standards? Well I hate it! I hate coming second to my brother to you and everyone else!"

Antonio tried to break in, "Are you mad about Feliciano being here? I was trying to find out what was wrong with you. That's all, I pro-"

"SHUT_ UP_, DAMMIT!" Lovino cut him off. He began walking towards Antonio, fists clenched at his sides. He knew that Antonio knew how violent he could get, and he watched as the Spaniard put his arms over his head, trying to protect himself. But it was no use. Lovino was driven and wrenched his arms apart, leaning in close to Antonio's face, closer then he had ever consciously been.

"And you know what else I just remembered I hate?! Huh?!" When Antonio didn't answer, he pushed himself forward, and their lips met. In that kiss, Lovino placed all of his new feelings from the past few days, and all of the feelings he had built up through the years. And Antonio felt it. As the country of passion, Lovino knew there was no way he didn't feel it. But although Antonio didn't struggle or move away, neither did he kiss him back. Lovino kissed Antonio until his breath ran short, and he had to break away, letting go of the other's hands in the process.

"I hate it that you asked Feliciano to marry you first, that I was just an afterthought. And more then anything else… I hate myself for caring, and not being able to do a damn thing about it."

He watched Antonio, waiting for a reaction. He had to know… whatever it was he needed to know in a situation like this.

"…Lovino, I…" he licked his lips, "Did you know you taste like tomatoes?"

"……Wait, _what?_"

"Yeah. Tomatoes. Were you eating one before I got here?"

This time Lovino really did punch him. Hard. Antonio doubled over, clutching his stomach in pain.

"Bastard!! I kiss you, and that's all you say!? That's all you can think of!?" He turned and started walking back to the house, rage in his every step, "Well that's just great, Antonio, great. I'll go get my stuff and leave. You'll never have to see my second-rate face again! Good luck with you sorry, pathetic, excuse of a life, bastard!"

Suddenly, Lovino felt Antonio's arms wrapped around his shoulders. He tried to break free, but found his body lacked the will to move.

"Oh Lovino, Lovino…" Antonio whispered into his ear making the hairs on the back of his neck bristle, "I love you, too. You have no clue how much, or how many times I've wanted to tell you."

Lovino felt his face, bright red by now, being lifted up to meet Antonio's own. The older man kissed him softly, and for once his heart was steady, tapping out a perfect beat against his ribcage. He twisted around and returned Antonio's kiss, their lips fitting together like the many pieces of a puzzle.

Antonio's arms snaked around Lovino's middle, gently rubbing his back and bringing them even closer together. Pulling away, Lovino rested his head on Antonio's shoulder, breathing in the familiar scent but not wanting to look him in the eye.

"You-" deep breath in, "You could have told me sooner… idiot."

Antonio laughed, "Yeah, maybe. But it was more fun this way, don't you think?" Lovino looked up, the answer plain on his face, "Okay, it wasn't more fun but… put yourself in my shoes, Lovi. I couldn't bear telling you and ruining what we had. And that's it."

He leaned back into Antonio's body, a slight smile playing across his face, "I guess I get it…maybe."

For a while they stood there, letting the sun wash over them, each one warming the other. The morning dew shone on the tomato plants that surrounded them.

"Hey… hey Antonio?"

The Spaniard reached up and began to stroke Lovino's soft brown hair, "What is it, my little tomato?"

Ignoring that last comment, he hugged Antonio tighter, not wanting the moment to end.

"I love you."


	8. Epilogue

_You thought it was over?? Well its not! ....... obvious author commentary is obvious.... oh well!_

* * *

Antonio smiled as he checked the reading on the thermometer, "Looks like you're all back to normal, Lovi!"

Lovino, currently sitting on his bed, pouted and crossed his arms, "I would have been normal from the start if you hadn't left me in the rain for two hours in _France_, dumbass!"

He leaned over and kissed the young Italian lightly on his temple, extracting the blush that made him look so much like a tomato, "Whatever you say my little tomato."

_Lovi is so cute…_ he thought as Lovino huffed and scooted down farther under the sheets, twisting around so his back was facing him. Chuckling to himself, Antonio slipped in after his new boyfriend. Carefully he wrapped his arms around the smaller body, letting out a sigh of contentment when he felt Lovino's figure relax into his own. Stretching, he gently kissed Lovino's pale cheek.

"Lovino?"

"Go to sleep."

"Do you love me?"

His query was met with silence. Apprehensive, Antonio hugged Lovino closer, "Lovino?"

"…Yeah, I do. I told you this morning, idiot. Can't you remember anything?"

Grinning he nuzzled his head into the curve of the other nation's neck, "I remember, Lovi. I was just checking."

"Fine. Now go to sleep already!"

"But Lovi, don't you want to-"

"GO TO SLEEP, DAMMIT!"

Antonio suppressed a laugh and let it drop. Lovino was probably exhausted anyways, even if he was only joking. Slowly he closed his eyes, and prepared to drift off into the land of sleep he had become so familiar with.

After a few minutes his eyes reopened. There was a question burning in his mind, and he knew there was no way he would be able to fall asleep without asking it.

"Lovino, I…" Antonio hesitated for moment, but it only lasted a second, "Does this mean you want to get married now?"

But Lovino did not answer. Antonio looked over the Italian's bare shoulder. His eyes were closed, his breathing even. Carefully he put his head back onto the pillow so as not to wake his sleeping partner. Oh, well. He could wait till morning to ask.

Shifting around to get comfy, Antonio started at the sound of Lovino's voice, drowsy and barely audible.

"I'm not wearing a dress…bastard."

Antonio reached over to turn Lovino's face. After giving him a kiss, soft and full of love, he put their foreheads together, supporting the Italian's head with his hand.

"That's more then I could ever ask for," he whispered into the night.

* * *

_Okay, NOW its over...... right, still obvious but whatever_

_Thank you for all of your lovely reviews!_


End file.
